A mans suit covered in lipstick after he had a full service massage with an Asian massage therapist

Is getting a full service massage cheating?


The topic of whether or not receiving a full service massage should be considered as cheating has been a long debated one within society. There are so many factors to say yes and of course, other factors that say no.


I took to the streets of London to ask some young men and women what their views on this controversial debate were, so I could try and find out an answer.


Dave, 27

“My girlfriend and I have been together for 4 years now and although we do have some dry spells with being busy and workloads, I would still never consider arranging a full service massage. It is essentially having sex with another woman when you have already committed to another. I don’t see the need and it would ruin my relationship with my girlfriend.  I would never want to have sex with another woman and I would be pretty devastated if I found out she had received a full service massage. It would definitely warrant the relationship ending!”


Selina, 22

“I have been with my boyfriend for around 2 years and I love him a lot. However he lives in Barcelona for university and I live in London so we have a long-distance relationship. Obviously, I get lonely and horny, so when I really feel as if I need that sexual gratification then I will get a full service massage. There is no emotional element or attachment to it at all so it is not cheating. It is like doing any other sort of activity such as running or swimming, it helps to relieve any tension or stress that I have. Of course, when my boyfriend is here I do not find the need to have one but they do help while he is away.”


Esther, 44

“As I have gotten older and had kids I have completely lost my sex drive. I do not enjoy sex anymore, nor do I want to do it or think about it. This upsets my husband as were very much still happily married and he yearns for that intimate connection with me. I knew I wanted to still be with him forever and apart from the sex issue we really are perfect, therefore I allow him to get a full service massage once a month. My friends think it’s crazy, bizarre and class it as cheating. However, we are on the same page and we have talked about how it is acceptable and something we both agree on. As long as he has sex with another woman on these terms then I am happy to let him do so.”


A woman biting her lip wearing red lipstick


Michael, 31

“I do believe that getting a full service massage should be classed as cheating. However, do I tell my wife that I receive one weekly? No, I don’t. In my opinion, what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her. I do not tell her because we don’t have any problems in our relationship. I do it because we are human and we are designed to have more than one sexual partner.”


Luna and Saul, 26 and 32

“We are a very spiritual couple and we believe that something so joyous and amazing as sex should be celebrated by all. We share so much love and energy with one another while we have sex and we like to extend this to other people. We often have orgies or we have sex with just one other person. We are constantly learning and it is always exciting bringing back what we have learnt from others into our relationship. We are both happy for one another to enjoy sex with other people and this openness only makes sex better for us. It is not cheating so long as we both consent to it.”


Peter, 46

“A few years back my wife was sadly in a fatal car crash which left her paralysed from the pelvis down. Obviously, this means she has no feeling or use in her legs or her genital area. We are unable to have sex and it is hard not being able to express my passion and love for her. I often visit a massage parlour and receive a full service massage with a regular lady. I do not tell my wife about this and I think if I did she would probably understand but I do not want to hinder our relationship as I do love being with her. I do feel very guilty about it and I know I am a cheat, but it helps me out a lot.”

 The conclusion to whether getting a full service massage is cheating

Overall, the men and women of London have many different experiences and opinions when it comes to the question ‘Is a full service massage cheating?’


I believe that as long as you and your partner have had an open conversation of the boundaries you expect within the relationship, then you should never have to question if it is cheating or not. Every person has their different perception of what it is as they have different expectations. You need to make sure your partner does not mind before you participate in any sort of sexual activity with another person.